Working In Progress

Single-track-minded Yu Shuxin has no OS (inner monologue)

by 为虞书欣打call的 SuperELLE欣漾
2023-03-17 21:49

PART 1
Small Joys No Longer Satisfy Me

She likes the cute version of herself, the soft and chubby version, and also the one who slimmed down for a role. She likes the slightly “crazy” version of herself on variety shows and the more composed, rational one that surfaces during interviews. “I’m more mature than you think,” she says—and truthfully, she doesn’t really care what you think. When the conversation flows and she’s having fun, Yu Shuxin speaks her mind freely, with no OS (inner monologue) to hold her back.

Behind-the-scenes photos from My Journey to You keep coming out, and we can’t help but wonder—could the director maybe open a weight-loss center on the side while filming? Fans have mixed feelings. On one hand, they’re looking at the before-and-after pictures and sighing, “How did Esther Yu get so skinny, like a little dried fish? ” On the other hand, they’re full of praise for the rare, visibly cool and aloof aura she now gives off. There’s a saying going around the jianghu—no one leaves a Guo Jingming set without losing weight. So of course, we had to ask: did Esther happen to receive this so-called “Guo-style slimming secret”?

“There’s no secret at all,” Esther Yu said right off the bat, dashing our eager hopes.

Before filming began, all the actors received a “warning” from the director: “You’ll need to slim down a bit.” He told them he uses full cinematic lighting—super intense—and if you’re even a little chubby, it won’t look good on camera. So, in pursuit of that shared and noble “”goal”—“beauty”—Esther Yu made up her mind: she would eat a full breakfast every morning, then hold out until nightfall. If she got hungry during the day, she’d just have a bit of pomelo. “I kept telling myself, absolutely do not think about anything delicious. As long as I have enough energy to work, that’s enough. Right now, I’m at my lowest weight in years.”

Looking at herself in the mirror, hair rollers on her head, Esther Yu said with absolute certainty:
“I like how I look when I’m slim—but honestly, the rounder version of me before was pretty cute too.”

Once a kind of “positive competition” took hold within the crew, there was no longer any need for director Guo Jingming to constantly crack his metaphorical little whip—the actors had started pushing themselves on their own. “Look at Jin Jing—she really buckled down and slimmed down so much. They all think I’m the one pressuring them, but honestly, I’m not! ” Esther Yu laughed. She poured all her energy into her character, the female lead Yun Weishan—who is described as “forbearing,” “humble,” and “deeply sensitive.” And with each of those words that came out of Esther’s mouth, the distance between her and the character seemed to grow wider and wider.

“I hope you won’t see even a trace of myself in the character.” That, Esther Yu says, is the part she enjoys the most. “If I do a scene well, I can be happy for a long time. I like that kind of result that comes from hard work—isn’t it said that the body releases dopamine or endorphins or something? Anyway, little pleasures like eating something tasty don’t satisfy me anymore.”

Everyone knows Esther Yu loves giving herself full-on character settings—even for a single song, she can describe in detail what emotion goes into each line of the lyrics and how many twists and turns she’s layered in. Director Guo Jingming told the actors, You need to give your characters some hidden backstory. Esther’s brain went into overdrive—she even assigned Yun Weishan a zodiac sign. “But I can’t tell you right now,” she said. “I’m afraid it’ll influence how you watch the show.”

“When I deliver lines, there’s so much more going on inside me than just the words! Subtext needs to be acted out.” You might assume Esther Yu is naturally dramatic—but in real life, she says, “I’m someone who doesn’t have an inner monologue. If something’s on my mind, I just say it. My thinking is pretty linear.”

Single-track thinking actually makes communication more efficient. For instance, at first, Guo Jingming thought Esther Yu’s aesthetic sense must be completely different from his. “He saw the photos I posted—all bright and colorful—and assumed I didn’t understand his kind of texture,” she said. “That’s exactly how he put it. We’re both very direct.” “But actually, I do get it. Deep down, I’m capable of embracing all kinds of styles.” Later, he realized that everything he chose was perfectly in line with her aesthetic taste. And beyond the beautiful costumes, sets, and styling, My Journey to You had one unbreakable rule when it came to visuals: no one was allowed to drag down the overall look. Even actors with just a few scenes had to meet the standard.

“I usually don’t pay attention to what other people are doing on set,” Esther Yu recalled with a small smile. “But this time, even during some background scenes, I couldn’t help but think—hey, that street vendor just now was actually kind of handsome! ”

PART 2
A Song Entirely in Its Own Rhythm

Back when Esther Yu watched My Love from the Star, she immediately liked Cheon Song-yi:
“She gets scolded by everyone, then goes home and cries—but in the end, people love her all over again.”

Everyone thought Cheon Song-yi in the drama was arrogant, unruly, and always did whatever she wanted.

“They don’t understand Cheon Song-yi!” Esther Yu suddenly grew serious.
“She only acts like that at home. Out in public, she puts on the mask of a celebrity—she knows exactly how to handle the media. I find that contrast so funny.” What Esther truly appreciates isn’t flamboyance, but attitude. “It’s like how I love when people say I have contrast—the bigger, the better. Even Director Guo (Guo Jingming) once said to me, ‘So you’re actually a very rational person.’”

Just like right now, chatting about this and that, Esther constantly tries to sort her thoughts with logic: “Do I come off as wise?” she asks playfully, then bursts into laughter. “I’m a little more mature than how I seem on variety shows, but as long as I’m happy, I can go back to that version of me anytime. No matter what’s happening outside, I’m always moving at my own pace.”

Yu Shuxin once said:

“Some people get your look and think you’re pretty. Others won’t like you no matter what. So don’t care too much about what others think—as long as you’re satisfied. Girls becoming beautiful isn’t about pleasing others; it’s about pleasing themselves. Your own happiness is what matters most.”

Since 2015, no matter which way the wind blew, Esther Yu has always gone her own way.
She’s actually taken time to reflect on why she has such a positive mindset—why her heart is so strong. Some speculate: maybe she grew up constantly praised, and that built her self-confidence. But Esther shuts that theory down immediately: “If you grow up with nothing but praise and never experience setbacks, wouldn’t that make a person even more fragile? I think it’s because from the moment I first ‘came into contact’ with the world, it was all criticism. I thought that was normal—like, if you sign up for a show, then you have to be ready to take that kind of judgment. Slowly, after working hard, I started to hear more and more compliments, and I began to feel like everything was a gift.”

That’s certainly one way to explain it. But perhaps even more importantly, Esther has a kind of detachment from it all: “I have some friends—when people criticize or give them advice, their first instinct is to defend themselves, like, ‘I’m not like that.’ But I don’t get into battles with people. If I’m absolutely certain inside that I’m not the person they say I am, and I think they don’t really understand me, then honestly, I just find it laughable. It’s like—” Esther pauses for a second, “—like if someone’s clearly a guy, but you keep insisting he’s a girl, and then go on to criticize his hair for not being long enough, or say he’s not pretty or feminine enough—isn’t that just ridiculous?”

What Esther Yu wants to express is this: a person should cultivate inner strength.
Every decision she makes always comes back to focusing on herself, rather than getting caught up in how others are watching or judging her.

“Once this drama wraps, I’m definitely taking a break first! ” She doesn’t say this like she’s being difficult—even though her career momentum is strong, a phase where many people would be reluctant to pause and only want to keep climbing—she clearly knows what she wants. “Otherwise, wouldn’t I just be trapping myself in a cycle? ” “Everything I do centers on my own condition. If I jump straight into another production without a break, my state might suffer. If I stay up late, I’ll be bloated at events. But if I can rest well and be in a good state, why not present myself that way?

PART 3
Yu Shuxin answers a few multiple-choice questions.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer yourself with straight or curly hair?
Esther Yu: I get “bored” of myself really easily. If I’ve had straight hair for a while, I’ll want curls. If I’ve been posting sweet, girly photos lately, I’ll suddenly want something cool and edgy. I respond to myself faster than the public does—their feedback hasn’t even caught up yet, and I’m already over it. Since I’m already styled with curls today, I might as well make the most of it and shoot a few more looks.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer acting or singing and dancing?
Esther Yu: Acting is my job—it’s something I have to keep doing. But singing and dancing? If there’s an opportunity, I’d definitely go for it too. Of course I’m not just lying around at home every day, obsessing over whether I love acting or singing more.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer historical costume dramas or modern ones?
Esther Yu: If you’re asking whether I prefer watching period dramas or modern dramas—then as long as the script is good, I’m fine with either. But if you’re asking whether I like period styling or modern styling, then I’d say—if it’s pretty, I like it.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer friends who are quiet or talkative?
Esther Yu: I have friends who don’t talk much, and I also have friends who are super chatty. For example, when I’m with Jin Jing, she talks way more than I do. She cracks jokes, and I just sit there laughing. When I’m in a good mood, I’ll talk a lot too. But if I’ve got a scene coming up with a ton of lines, then I won’t joke around with everyone—I’ll stay quiet.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer being sensitive or thick-skinned?
Esther Yu: It depends. In everyday life—when you’re dealing with people’s opinions and comments—being a little more thick-skinned is definitely better. But when it comes to acting, you do need to be more sensitive. Otherwise, you won’t be able to pick up on the reactions your scene partners are giving you. I guess I can switch back and forth as needed.

SuperELLE: Do you prefer being called cute or smart?
Esther Yu: Well, I don’t think people really call me smart… They all say I’m cute.

CREDITS:

Photography: OLIVERJUNE
Styling: WANG AN
Editor: JY
Digital Editor: WAIWAI WONG
Makeup: 王亚飞
Hair:潇天ELIO
Interview/Text: 陈惊雷
Editor: JY
Design: SHU
Producer: 奥利娃（光辉女郎制作）
Art Direction: AUSTIN
Production Assistant: Buang Xinzhi
Art Assistant: BABALA
Wardrobe Assistants: Amber、柿子

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1. Single-track-minded Yu Shuxin has no inner monologue: https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/pMIDvGxOkRtqe7OhgXV2cw
2. 内心没有OS: “内心” = inner world/mind/heart; “OS” is a slang term from Japanese, short for “over-soul” or “off-screen speech,” and in Chinese internet slang it often means inner thoughts/monologue/commentary.
3. “小鱼干” is kept as “little dried ”fish”—internet slang for someone very slim, especially in a delicate or skinny-cute way.